Worries
The Bible says “who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life” and “be anxious in nothing”. Pretty clear guidance there. Even so, I worry all the time about things I really shouldn’t be worried about. So this morning I began thinking about some of the things throughout my life that caused me the greatest worry. It’s true, worrying didn’t change the situation at all. Even so, I worried big time!
Here’s a short list of some of those worries:
(1) In first grade when I had a pencil stuck in my forehead after a fight and waited in the office for my Mom to get to school
(2) In fourth grade when I had slipped a note to a girl next to me with “do you love me?” on it and waited for her to circle “yes” or “no”
(3) In sixth grade when I cut up a ceramic ash tray into little bitty pieces in front of my teacher and got hauled to the office and then had to wait for my Mom to show up again
(4) In tenth grade when I waited for the cut list for the baseball team
(5) In eleventh grade when I waited for a “yes” or “no” from a beautiful young lady at church wondering if she’d go out with me
(6) In twelth grade when I waited anxiously for word back from the Air Force Academy and then got rejected for medical reasons
(7) Later that same year when I waited even more anxiously for a ruling on my appeal
(8) In my sophomore year at the Academy when I waited anxiously to meet with the Dean of the Faculty to determine whether or not I would be allowed to stay in the Electrical Engineering program
(9) In my junior year when I asked a very special and beautiful young lady to marry me and waited for her answer
(10) In my senior year when I waited for notification that I received the career choice and base of assignment that I asked for
(11) Shortly after I graduated and went to that base of choice as I waited anxiously again for an answer from that same special and beautiful young lady about whether or not she’d marry me
(12) In 1984 when we waited anxiously for results of the pregnancy test
(13) In 1987 when we waited anxiously for results of the pregnancy test
(14) In 1988 when I waited anxiously to see if I did indeed get selected for that special assignment in the Air Force
(15) In 1992 when I got the call that our daughter was struggling for life in the womb
(16) In 1992 when I got the call that our daughter in second grade was missing from elementary school
(17) In 1993 when we waited anxiously for the results of the pregnancy test
(18) In 1994 when I waited nervously for confirmation of being selected for a special duty assignment in the Air Force
(19) In 1997 when I worried nonstop about my choice to leave the active duty Air Force
(20) In 1998 when I quit my job and was jobless for the first time
(21) In 1999 when I started my own company and second guessed every decision I then made
(22) In 2001 when I left my own company, headed to Silicon Valley, watched in horror the events of 9/11 and then went without pay for seven months
(23) In 2003 when I went through an 8.5 hour interview and waited nervously for that call that would tell me whether or not I got the job or not
(24) In 2005 when I chose to leave a leadership job and move to a staff position, knowing how much I hated staff jobs
(25) In 2008 when I desperately wanted to go back to a company leadership position and it took 9 months to have that desire fulfilled
I skipped over so many things that made me nervous – waiting for the results of promotion boards; waiting to know if I owe or are owed during tax season; waiting for a “yes” or “no” on a home mortgage loan; waiting for yearend numbers to know if I get a bonus or not; waiting for that actual signature on a contract that follows up a verbal announcement.
As I look back on all of these and so many more, I can honestly say my worrying and my anxiety did nothing to affect the outcome. “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” But I must admit, I certainly thought some very bizarre things during those times of great worry and great anxiety. I may have even learned a thing or two about myself!
In the end though, I need to listen and learn – “be anxious in nothing”!