Musings at Altitude

In the hundreds of pictures that are taken and the millions of moments that occur, only a very few pictures capture the real excitement, the real joy, the real meaning of life.  This is one of them:

We’ve enjoyed having our daughter and granddaughter around the house this week (our oldest daughter and the little one’s mother took this picture).  With all the web technology available today that allows us to watch near real time as she grows, there’s nothing quite like holding her in our arms and seeing up close her personality developing!

Today, they go back home though, and at least for a while, we’ll be back to those precious moments on web cams or the hundreds of pictures shared constantly on the internet.  That will hold us over till the next time we get to spoil her, but it won’t be the same.  She may very well be walking by then.  She’ll probably be saying those first words with a limited but very funny vocabulary.  And she will most likely have more rhythm than me by then, which wouldn’t take much, although she’s getting close with the clapping that she’s doing today!

It’s fun to watch them grow up…all of them…including the new parents. 

I hope they too cherish every one of these special moments!

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As I sat at the bus stop with my 14 year old this morning, the conversation went something like this:

Me – “Is it a good day or bad day at school today?”  [Note – good day is any day without math and civics to her.]

Her – “It’s a good day, but I don’t want to do 50 pushups in gym.”

Me – “It won’t be that bad.”

Her – “But it’s almost Friday!”

Me – “It’s only Tuesday.”

Her – “I’ve been waiting for this Friday for 2 months now!”

Me – “But it’s only Tuesday.”

Her – “Bye Dad.”

Me – “Love you.”

Her – “Love you too.”

Two things make me smile about this conversation:

(1) if the only thing she’s worried about in school is 50 pushups, that’s a very good thing

(2) if by Tuesday she’s already excited about Friday, she’s going to have a great week

Isn’t it awesome that a 14 year old looks toward the future with such great excitement and finds motivation every single day by what’s to come.

In a sense, I do the same thing, just not with the incredible excitement that she does.  I live for those moments that are close to nirvana.  I ground myself on tomorrow being better than today, regardless of how awesome today may be.  And I smile in knowing that with every step towards that nirvanic future, I’ve learned something new, met someone new, and accomplished something new.

I think that’s going to be my new motto – “it’s almost Friday!”  But not because it marks the end of an otherwise dreary week, but instead, because it marks the achievement of something very special!

Friday is after all, nirvana in itself!

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It’s hard not to smile when you wake up to this:

Or spent lots of the weekend with this:

Or got rejected for a picture like this:

And get to do a team photo like this:

It’s a wonderful day after a joy filled weekend!

Joel 2:21- “Fear not, O land; be glad and rejoice, for the Lord has done great things!”

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I’m fairly introspective.  I constantly assess what I’m doing.  I also frequently ask others for their feedback on what I’m doing and how I’m supporting them.  My goal is to match my self assessment with that external assessment to see if what I sense and see matches what others are telling me.  In a way, since perceptions can often times be reality, I’m seeking “the true me”…that caricature that effectively conveys who I am in those various roles that I play.

There have been times where the feedback I received took me totally by surprise.  I viewed me very, very differently than those that worked with and for me.  When I thought I was “cranking on all cylinders” and doing great things for the organization, others saw me as failing to honor the commitments I was making and letting them down in the process. 

And there have been other times where the external reports matched perfectly with my own self assessment, in both the positive and negative comments.  At those times, the affirmation brings smiles even if the comments provide confirmation of things I need to be doing differently.

So who is “the true me”?  This picture above was given to me when I left my last duty assignment in the active Air Force.  My team wanted to capture their version of “the true me”!  It’s pretty close to who I thought I was then, and to who I think I still am today.  I’m still a cheerleader.  I’m still an eternal optimist.  I still live every day wanting tomorrow to be today.  I still desperately desire nirvana at work and at home.  I still want every single interaction to be meaningful.  And I still want everyone I work with to feel blessed, to be blessed, and to feel loved.

So that’s the true me – a work in progress that really does believe that “it doesn’t need to be this hard.”

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We woke up this morning to a beautiful sunrise and this picture from the front of our house:

We will have a spectacular morning in Colorado Springs, but the winter storm watch for this evening has already been posted.  Here’s the weather forecast for later today, courtesy of www.weather.com:

Isolated thunderstorms this evening, with snow showers developing late.  Low 29 degrees.  Winds N at 10 to 20 mph.  Chances of snow 60%.  1 to 3 inches expected.

And then for tomorrow:

Periods of snow and windy.  Cold.  High near 30 degrees.  Winds N at 20 to 30 mph.  Chance of snow 70%.  4 to 6 inches of snow expected.

As I sit here this morning staring at the ever so lonely cloud on my Eastern horizon, I have to smile in thinking that this one cloud can be foreshadowing such an ominous event!

But isn’t that like business too?  We can be cruising right along in bright sunshine and that one lonely cloud comes up on the horizon as a warning, or even promise, of potentially ominous times ahead.  Great businesses look at that cloud and then quickly find that forecast.  If that cloud is indeed a lonely transient in an otherwise spectacular forecast, those businesses charge on with a smile to the front and a cautious eye to the side – just in case.  If that cloud is indeed a forewarning of storms in the near future, great businesses prepare.  They adapt.  They change their business plans.  But they most certainly don’t charge forward hoping the forecast is wrong, and trying to outrun the upcoming storm. 

Or do they?   Is it possible to stay one step in front of that storm while still being prepared just in case we get engulfed in it?

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I had to smile when I saw this picture of the granddog and granddaughter side by side:

The similarities are stark – both stretched out on the floor; both with drool running down their chins; both with a “what the heck are you doing” look on their faces, and a “I don’t need this” attitude; and both staring off into some unknown area of focus, anxiously wondering if they’ll get a treat for being so good for the picture!

I’m blessed to have one of the two visiting with me in Colorado Springs right now!  Fortunately, it’s the one that leaves a mess in the diaper rather than a pile in the bedroom on the floor in front of the dresser!

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Yesterday was a typical spring day in Colorado.  Blustery snow in the morning; sunshine by noon; clouds moving in by 3:00; and then 2-5 inches of snow by bed time.  We woke up this morning to this:

It’s a very heavy snow too, not the light powdery stuff that comes in winter!

Last night, when it took twice as long to make a routine trip, I was reminded of how much business is like spring in Colorado.  You can wake up to beautiful skies and warm temperatures, and then within hours, temperatures can drop 30-40 degrees and all life can be completely engulfed in a blizzard.

During those times of blue skies and warm sunshine, we push down on the accelerator and get as far as we can as fast we can!  We feel safe, with dry roads and clear visibility.  When we get tired, we put the top down, turn the radio up, and drive even faster, letting the rush of the air and the noise of the juke box keep us awake!  And every now and then we stop for gas, check the gauges and the fluid levels, and get back on that fast moving highway as quickly as possible to get as far as we can on any particular trip we are taking.

But when the weather sets in, we slow down, we put both hands back on the wheel, and we focus on the road ahead of us and the drivers in the vehicles all around us.  We quit drinking that Starbucks and eating those snacks, because we don’t want to risk any distractions that could potentially put us in a perilous spin down the road.  We also turn the radio down and keep the windows rolled up, minimizing the noise so we’re listening to both the performance of the car and any unexpected noise from those around us.  Every now and then we try to find a weather & traffic station to get an update, but we don’t leave the volume up because the background filler around the weather and traffic becomes completely irrelevant to the focus we need on the road.  In the worst of conditions, we snuggle up close to a snow plow and make sure we sit tight in the comfort of the clean roads in his wake.  Or, if it’s too early for plows on the roads, we put our tires in the chain chopped tracks from the 18 wheelers to find some traction and security in the otherwise very dangerous drive.

I personally like the big skies and unimpeded roads!  But there’s something special about making a perilous trek and bringing any precious cargo through it safely!

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Tuesday’s are tough for me.  Always a minimum of 5 hours in meetings.  Most of the time, 3 or 4 of those hours are on the phone, with very few if any breaks.  And it’s incredibly tough for me to stay focused.

So I’m grateful when I’m in my office in Colorado Springs and I get to look out my window at Pikes Peak and allow my mind to meander while the conversation goes on behind me on the phone.

And during the intensity of the conference calls today, I took this picture out my window:

As I studied this picture, my mind focused in on the special meaning behind several things in this view. 

For example, the train carrying a full load of coal is on the downward side of a significantly tough journey up to a maximum height of 7,000 feet above sea level just North of Colorado Springs.  It’s down to about 6,300 feet at this point, and heading down to just about sea level by the time it gets to the plains of Texas.  We passed several of these loaded coal trains heading South during our weather interrupted journey this past weekend, and we passed several other completely empty trains heading back North for another load. 

As another example, the cement truck up on I-25 is a sign of infrastructure work being done on the highways and bridges around Colorado Springs.  Much of this work was begun long before the stimulus package promised so much more work, and I’ve often called it a public works project because it’s never ending on the highways and overpasses of Colorado.  With the stimulus funding coming, I imagine this current work, which already impedes traffic during our busiest hours, will only intensify and expand, thus causing even more headaches for those struggling to get to work on time or get home for a relaxing evening with the family.

And as a final example, the parking lots of the buildings all around our office are full…including our own.  Although we’re hearing all the time about the struggles in the economy today, the traffic and the parking lots offer a very different story and present a sign of economic recovery rather than economic distress.  I hope that’s true because I’m tired of the dire warnings of the tough times ahead.  I want to smile in seeing the parking lots full and the highways packed!

After studying this fairly narrow view for a while, I pulled back and took in the glory of the broader image out my office window:

I thanked our Creator for His magnificent creation and then went back to focusing on the discussion at hand.  Fortunately, I didn’t miss anything during those mental meanderings.  That’s sad in a sense, but also fairly typical of intensely bureaucratic discussions. 

I add very little value to any discussion on policy or standards or process, so it may very well have been a better use of my time to stare out the window and let my mind wander and then get ready to reengage with a revived spirit and a big smile on my face!

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Folks all over are praying now more than ever…praying for our country…praying for jobs…praying because of jobs…praying because of sickness or health concerns…and praying for something to smile about.

But we need to be careful about what we pray for…sometimes our prayers are answered in very unexpected ways.

A number of years ago, a friend of mine asked me to join him in prayer because he was really struggling at work and was very unhappy.  He wanted something positive to happen.  He desperately wanted to be excited again.  So he prayed…fervently…seeking peace and contentment through work.

A few weeks after this request he called me up and said, “You can stop praying now – I got fired.”  He readily admitted that a change occurred and therefore his prayers were answered, though not in the way he wanted.  Fortunately, he found a job a few weeks later and he’s been comfortably and contentedly employed ever since.  But he certainly experienced a few anxious weeks, which he directly attributed to his prayers that were answered, but not in the way originally expected!

I’m very guilty at times of focusing on the dreariness or drudgery of things that may be happening in my life and in my work, and in those times, my prayers become quite candid and quite self serving.  I could easily see my anxiousness to share my woe-is-me issues with our heavenly Father as an opportunity for Him to share His you-need-to-trust-me love in the subsequent actions.  And I could also fully understand His let’s-see-if-you-believe-me attitude as adversity sets in and He watches closely to see if I truly can “be anxious in nothing”. 

So I’m thinking back to the lessons learned by my friend and seeing very clearly that we need to be careful what we pray for.  So I’m praying that those I know who are struggling with jobs will find peace, contentment and wisdom.  I’m praying that they make the right decisions in these tough times.  And I’m praying that each of them will truly “be anxious in nothing” and trust in the perfect plan of our Creator.

For me personally, I’m being very careful now when raising my own petitions to our Father above.  I’m quite a bit less flippant with my prayers now and more scrutinizing of what I’m asking for and what I’m actually wanting versus needing. 

And for many of my friends who are unhappy with their jobs right now, I’ll pass on the wisdom of a good friend and remind them, “don’t forget you have a mortgage”, which is his own very special way of telling me, “be careful what you pray for”!

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It took 51 hours to drive home from Houston.  This was about 24 hours longer than usual, as we got held up in Wichita Falls, Texas, waiting for the highways to open after a fast moving blizzard blocked all the roads that would have taken us back into Colorado.  Fortunately, we found a hotel with a Starbucks 10 minutes away and a Red Lobster within walking distance.  It doesn’t get much better than that if you’re stranded.  And it certainly was significantly better than the last time we heard the roads were closed and kept driving hoping to get as far as possible before having to stop.  That time, just a couple of year ago, we ended up staying in an emergency shelter on New Year’s Eve in Dumas, Texas.  We learned some valuable lessons through our time at the shelter, so this time we stopped further away from the closed roads where hotel rooms were still available!

When we got back on the road today and I spent hours staring at the fairly non-descript Texas landscape, I realized how much I really appreciate Colorado.  I have two pictures to share.

This first one is the view from the road in Texas:

And this second one is the view from the road in Colorado:

There is a stark contrast between the flat and truly sleep inducing view in the plains of Texas versus the mountainous and quite majestic views in Colorado. 

I find myself literally waking up as I get sight of the Rockies in Northeastern New Mexico, and then I’m wide awake as I charge through the mountain passes and enter Colorado. 

So I’m glad to be home!  I’m excited to wake up to the purple mountains’ majesty this week and enjoy the serenity of the views and mountain breeze.  I’m also excited to quit looking for ways to entertain ourselves on an incredibly long drive. 

At one point during the most boring parts of the drive, we kept tracking the numbers on our mile-o-meter, and even took a picture when we hit “five of a kind”.  The full house was interesting.  Four of a kind was pretty exciting.  But nothing beats five of a kind!

By the fact we were taking pictures of our odometer you can hopefully sense how non-descript the scenery was at that time outside the car!

But we’re home, and we’ll quickly get back in our routine.  And hopefully we won’t be on another long road trip for a while.  At least not until we’re close to the next five of a kind on the mile-o-meter (that’s 88,888 if you were struggling with that one) and in the middle of the summer so absolutely no chance of road closures because of blizzards!

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