Musings at Altitude

I was taken aside and counseled a while ago by a consultant helping us with change management.  She said, “You need to learn to listen first, ask questions second, and then respond with whatever wisdom you may have.”  I was shocked first, and then stunned.  I thought I was a listener, and she was bluntly and very clearly telling me I had work to do in that arena.

I’ve thought about that many times since then.  In fact, I carry a card in my wallet that’s visible when I pull it out.  It says, “STOP-THINK”, and it’s my attempt to slow my path to spewing down just enough to listen.

I’m still not good at it.  In fact, as I watch others around me, most folks aren’t good at it.

Leaders tend to give an answer or at least get to the answer as quickly as possible, thus allowing them to get on to the next most important priority.  Many times, that zest to keep things moving defies the whole idea of listening.  And not listening, denies that leader the chance to hear the whispers, to get the pulse of the organization, to hear the other side of the story, to get all the facts and the background, or to simply assess the ideas and recommendations of those trying to present the information or options.

After years of trying, I can tell you from firsthand experience that it’s not easy to listen.

I can also tell you that there are consequences – sometimes severe - to not listening.

Listen first.  Then ask questions.  Then respond with your years of experience or current inside knowledge.

You’ll be a better leader and person because of it.