Compulsion or Focus?
While I’ve been off on this latest trip, my wife and 14 year old have been obsessively focused on a puzzle…obviously a fairly difficult puzzle. I’ve called my wife countless times, text messaged countless more times, and every time she was hovering over the coffee table working on this puzzle.
Just for definition, dictionary.com defines compulsion as “a strong, usually irresistible impulse to perform an act, especially one that is irrational or contrary to one’s will”. The same site defines focus as “a central point, as of attraction, attention or activity”.
So I have to ask the question – are the actions of my wife compulsive or just focus?
Let me tell you more. Starting in the evening yesterday, I became very concerned as each time I tried to communicate with my wife she was making grunting noises in apparent agony as she worked on this puzzle. At one point I asked her through text message which puzzle she was working on, and her response was – “the fricken stupid idiotic dumb frustrating coca cola one! Ugh!” Now I’m not any form of therapist, but that pretty much alone took it out of the “focus” category and put it very clearly in “compulsive”. Just to further confirm the category her actions fall in, I text messaged her shortly after the above exchange and said, “So, you’re having fun huh??” She quickly popped back, “Not!”
After a night of restful sleep, we picked up right where we left off with me at work and her at the puzzle. I called her and mentioned that her behavior was pretty compulsive, and she disputed that with me. Shortly thereafter I sent her a text saying, “compulsive”, and she responded with “Bite me!” That iced it…no doubt about it…her actions are compulsive!
I’m heading home this evening and I’m desperately hoping that the “fricken stupid idiotic dumb frustrating coca cola” puzzle is done. I don’t want to engage my wife in any kind of “honey I’m home” banter if she’s head down over that puzzle. That’s high risk for me…dangerously high risk.
Did I tell you she’s Cajun?